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送交者: goodid 于 北京时间 05时 6/17 (642 reads) [goodid累积13900分]
主题：人生感悟：妒嫉心害人害己-Lessons from Life: Jealousy Harms Ourselves and Others
[宗教信仰论坛] 作者：贯明
[正见网2004年11月24日]
二十年前，第三批国家公派的赴日本国留学生共计67人在大连外国语学院进行出国前的日语培训。在笔者所在的培训班里，只有三位女生。其中的两人长相一般，另外一人则是人见人爱的俊俏美人。那位美女自然而然的成了全班男同学宠爱的对象，致使两位长相一般的女生时时刻刻都有受到男同学冷淡对待的感觉。
大连地处中国东北地区，冬天的夜晚异常寒冷。由于学生宿舍的房间内没有厕所，晚上小解时必须走一段距离才能去房外的厕所。那三位女生同居一室，房间距厕所比较远。话说有一天晚上，那位俊俏的美女在半夜时尿急，只穿短衣短裤急急忙忙去了厕所。然而，当她返回自己的房间时，却发现宿舍的门被人从里面反锁了。她站在门外只觉得寒风刺骨，大声呼叫房间内的人却得不到应声。由于深夜的喊声十分响亮，惊动了许多男同学起床观看。在寒风中只见那美女同学冻得发抖，却一时猜不着到底发生了什么事。最后那位美女同学忍无可忍，拿砖头打破了玻璃窗口才得以进入房内，里面的两位女生仍然装睡不醒。从此以后，美女与那两位女生形同仇敌，相见时彼此咬牙切齿，直到培训结束时仍然互不答言。
这件事情使我深思了很久。中国人妒嫉心竟然如此强烈！我们整个民族由于受儒教的影响，形成了很内向的性格，但是这种内向的性格也同时造就了许多妒嫉心极其强烈的人。在中国的历史上，有几个因嫉妒心极其强烈而闻名的“人物”。最典型的莫过于周瑜和庞涓。
《三国演义》中，诸葛亮“三气周瑜”的故事，恐怕是老百姓最熟知的。周瑜是一位年青得志、文武双全的雄才，２４岁就被授予建成中郎将，３４岁率军破曹，以少胜多，取得了历史上有名的赤壁之战的辉煌胜利。然而他有一个致命的弱点，就是性格暴躁、好胜心太强、心胸狭隘、骄傲轻浮、嫉妒贤能、情绪容易激动。对于才能胜过自己的孔明，总是耿耿于怀，不是虚心请教，而是伺机陷害。其结果种种计策都被孔明识破，还被大大羞辱了一场，周瑜最后被气得大叫一声后，不久便一命呜呼了。临死前，他还仰天长叹“既生瑜，何生亮！”显示出他只能天下第一、不能天下第二的高度虚荣心及对孔明的嫉妒。
而孔明的性格则比周瑜好得多。他为人宽宏大量、谦虚谨慎、勤奋好学、目光远大。为顾全大局，他帮周瑜取得赤壁之战的胜利，但周瑜逼他太甚，一次又一次设计杀他，孔明才将计就计，使周瑜的毒计一个个破产。
较之周瑜，庞涓的嫉妒可谓更胜一筹。春秋战国时，孙膑与庞涓曾同拜于一个师父的门下，各有所长。但庞涓在出道之后，已是魏国的将军了，仍嫉妒着孙膑，怕孙膑的才情胜过自己。于是，他就生了狠毒的心，骗孙膑赴约，挖其膝盖骨，再墨型刺脸，置其于囹圄。从此，孙膑“疯疯颠颠”的，已站立不起，又破了相。后来，有人相助，孙膑就暗中见了来访的齐国使者，一吐自己的惨况。齐国的使者惊讶之后，救了他，并带孙膑一起返齐。这一走，就注定了孙膑的最后的胜利。去齐国之后，孙膑将其智慧与谋略展示给齐王，终让齐王信任，被任命为军师，为将军田忌谋划。这时候的孙膑，坐在帷幔围着的战车里，不露真容，但却在一步一步接近自己的目标。
马陵一仗，孙膑、庞涓一决胜负。魏国与赵国联兵攻打韩国，韩国向齐国告急。于是，齐王便让田忌当大将，前往救韩。为救韩，田忌率兵就直奔魏国，捣毁老窝。庞涓闻讯，只得撤出韩国，赶将回来。这时齐兵已西去，庞涓穷追三日，见沿途的灶台逐渐减少，大喜，以为齐军懦弱，已逃遁大半，且不知正中了孙膑之计。在被刮掉半块皮后的一棵大树上写着：“庞涓死在这棵树下！”然后，孙膑等着，等着这一刻的到来…… 庞涓追来了，追进了狭窄的山沟里，在傍晚将黑的夜色中看到那棵大树。于是，他点着了火把，让亮光照着，读那一行字，明白了自己的末日已到。的确，是庞涓的末日了，那万箭拉开的气势，是孙膑坚定的命令，让燃起的火光告之四面埋伏的将士：是时候了，射！庞涓倒下了，万箭之中，他自杀而亡。但自杀之前，他留下的那句话是：“这一仗可让这小子出名了。”这小子指的当然是孙膑。由此，庞涓的狭隘、嫉妒，至死不变。
嫉妒心像一柄双刃毒剑，既威胁别人，又毒害自己。一旦沾染，就不能自拔。由周瑜、庞涓至死都不改的嫉妒心，可以看出这一点。据医学家分析，嫉妒心作为一种不良心理，极易引发心血管疾病。在西方，著名的童话故事《白雪公主》，也在不断的告诫着一代又一代的人：心存嫉妒的恶毒的人下场是很可悲的。从历史上看，出于嫉妒、恶毒，欲加害于人的人，往往是“搬起石头，砸自己的脚。”或遗臭万年、或沦为笑柄。因此，妒嫉心害人害己绝非虚言。任何一个立志做好人的正人君子，都应该诚心的为他人的优点与长处而鼓掌，以博大的胸怀看待他人的成功。
Guan Ming
[PureInsight.org] About 20 years ago, the Chinese government put a group of young scholars who had received government scholarships to study abroad in Japan through a special Japanese language training program at the Dalian Foreign Language College before they were to leave for Japan. I was one of the students. There were only three female students in our class. Two of them were ordinary looking, but the third one was a stunning beauty. Naturally, that young lady became the belle of the class whom every male scholar in the class tried to please. Consequently, the other two women were not getting any attention and felt neglected, and became very jealous of her.
Dalian is located in northeastern China where the winter nights are unbelievably cold. Because there was no bathroom in the students’ dormitories, we had to walk a long distance in sub-zero temperatures if we needed to use the bathroom outside the dormitories at night. The three women shared a dormitory room that was further from the bathroom than the male dormitory rooms. One night, the beautiful girl had to use the bathroom in a hurry, so she hopped out of her bed in short-sleeve T-shirt and shorts and hurried to the bathroom. However, when she returned from the bathroom, she found that the door of her room had been locked from inside. She kept calling out her two roommates while standing outside in sub-zero temperature, but no one came out to open the door for her. Her calling in the middle of the night woke up many students in the male dorm rooms. Many of them got out of their beds and looked outside the window. They saw the beautiful lady trembling in the biting wind, but they couldn’t figure out what was happening. Eventually, she had no choice but to smash the window on the door with a brick in order to get inside the dormitory. Even when she finally entered her room, her two roommates still pretended to be sound sleep. From then on, the beauty and the two jealous women became enemies. They exchanged fierce looks whenever they met. In fact, they never spoke a word to each other throughout the rest of the training.
The episode made a deep impression on me. It struck me as shocking that people can be consumed by their jealousy! The Chinese people have developed very introverted personalities due to the influence of Confucianism, and this introverted personality has caused us to have very strong jealousy. In Chinese history, there were several historic characters most notorious for their mad jealousy. Among them, Zhou Yu and Pang Juan were the two most jealous characters in history.
There was a famous Chinese novel called The Romance of the Three Kingdoms. It is a book mixing facts with fiction about the epoch of the rival Three Kingdoms, Wei, Han and Wu. The episodes where Zhuge Liang (the greatest strategist of Han State) vexed Zhou Yu (a famous militarist and strategist of Wu State) three times in a row are probably the most famous parts of the novel. Zhou Yu was a young talented militarist and strategist. He was appointed the chief commander of the Wu army at the young age of 24. He urged his king, Sun Quan, to establish an alliance with the Han Kingdom to fight against the Wei Kingdom, which controlled all the North China Plains. Even though they were outnumbered, Wu and Han armies defeated Wei army in the decisive battle of Red Cliffs of 228 AD. Zhou Yu was only 34 at the time.
However, Zhou Yu had one tragic flaw. He was overly competitive, which caused him to become short-tempered, narrow-minded, arrogant, emotional and, worst of all, extremely jealous of people with more talent than him. He saw Zhuge Liang, the counselor to the Han Kingdom and the most famous military strategist in Chinese history, as his archenemy. Zhuge Liang, on the other hand, was known to be a generous, humble, a prudent and diligent scholar with vision. In order to defeat the strongest of the three kingdoms, Wei, Zhuge Liang was willing to work with Zhou Yu to win the Battle of the Red Cliffs together. Instead of humbly learning from Zhuge Liang, after they won the battle together, Zhou Yu always sought opportunities to defeat Zhuge Liang or have him assassinated. However, the ingenious Zhuge Liang was always one step ahead of him. He always had the perfect countermoves, which humiliated Zhou Yu even more and severely injured his hubris. After a final defeat in a battle of wits, Zhou Yu shrieked in despair and died shortly afterwards. Even before he died, he was completely consumed by his mad jealousy. Before he died, he mourned, “God, since you have created me, why did you have to create Zhuge Liang!” The fact that Zhou Yu refused to settle for second place and insisted on being in first place at all cost revealed his severe attachment to vanity and his jealousy of Zhuge Liang’s talent.
Pang Juan (the general of the Wei State during the Warring States Period) was even more madly jealous than Zhou Yu. Pang Juan and Sun Bin were both students under the tutelage of an ingenious military strategist named Gui Gu Zi, a recluse who lived on a mountain. They were both very talented, but Sun Bin was the more talented of the two. Pang Juan had graduated earlier and become the general of Wei State before Sun Bin completed his studies. Pang knew Sun Bin was more talented than he was, so he was worried that King Hui of Wei might promote Sun to a position above him. So Pang devised a vicious scheme to frame Sun Bin for treachery behind his back. As a result, the King Hui found Sun guilty of treason and Pang Juan had Sun Bin’s kneecaps removed and his cheeks tattooed with the word, “treachery.” Sun Bin survived by pretending to be mentally deranged. To verify Sun Bin’s insanity, Pang Juan even imprisoned Sun Bin in a pig pen and fed him with pig feces. The ambassador of the Kingdom of Qi rescued Sun Bin during a trip to the Wei State and brought him back to the Qi State. Once in the Qi State, Sun Bin impressed the King of Qi with his outstanding talent and wisdom as a military advisor. He won the respect and trust of the King of Qi, and was appointed chief military advisor working with a co-commander of the Qi army, Tian Ji. However, Sun Bin would hide himself in the curtained chariot to avoid alarming Pang Juan.
In 354 BC, the King of Wei had Pang Juan initiate a large-scale attack on the Kingdom of Zhao. By 353 BC, the Kingdom of Zhao was losing badly. As a result, the neighboring State of Qi decided to help Zhao. The strategy Qi used, suggested by the ingenious tactician Sun Bin, was to attack Wei’s territory while the main Wei army was busy laying a siege on Zhao, forcing the Wei army to retreat. The strategy was a success. The Wei army hastily retreated, and encountered the Qi midway, culminating in the Battle of Guiling where the Wei army was decisively defeated. The event spawned the famous phrase, “Attacking Wei to save Zhao.”
In 341 BC, the Kingdom of Wei attacked the Kingdom of Han, and the Kingdom of Qi tried to help Han. Pang Juan and Sun Bin met on the battlefield again. Sun Bing devised the brilliant strategy of directly attacking the capital city of Wei since the Wei army had become exhausted after having been battling with the Han for a long period of time. Again, Pang Juan had to retreat from Han to save the capital city. When Pang Juan returned to his capital, he found that the Qi army had already retreated. Outraged by the defeat in Guiling and Sun Bin’s attack on Qi’s capital city, Pang Juan was determined to wipe out Qi’s army. He pursued Sun Bin’s army for three days. Each day he saw fewer marks of campfires on the ground and delightedly thought a larger and larger number of Qi’s soldiers had fled. Thus he walked into a trap that Sun Bin set up in a narrow passage in a mountain in Maling. His army was besieged in the narrow mountain passage where he had no place to hide or flee. When Pang Juan was finally cornered under a giant tree at night, he lit a torch and found a large area of the tree trunk had been peeled away and inscribed with the message, “Pang Juan died under this very tree!” This was the very moment Sun Bin was waiting for.
The torch Pang Juan lit was a signal for the Qi army to attack. When Sun Bin saw the light of the torch and saw Pang Juan had read the message on the tree, he shouted out the order, “Shoot!” The entire Qi army started shooting tens of thousands of arrows at the torch in the dark. Pang Juan collapsed with hundreds of arrows in him like a porcupine before he killed himself. Before he died, he said, “That other guy is going to be extremely famous for this battle!” Of course, “that other guy” must have referred to Sun Bin. Even in the second before he died, Pang Juan was still overcome with his jealousy of Sun Bin’s superior talent.
Jealousy is a like a poisonous dagger with a blade at each end. It harms others and the holder of the dagger. Once a man develops jealousy over another, he will be possessed by his jealousy. Zhou Yu and Pang Juan were stubbornly jealous to the end of their lives.
According to modern medical experts, jealousy can cause a lot of heart-related diseases. In the western culture, the moral of the story of Snow White is that jealousy makes a person vicious and will lead him to his tragic ruin. History has taught us that people driven by their vicious jealousy to attack the subjects of their jealousy are pretty much shooting at their own feet. The jealous people will create for themselves a bad reputation that will be long remembered or they will become laughing stocks for generations to come. Everyone who resolves to be a moral person should be genuinely happy for other people’s merits, talents and/or good fortune and accept other people’s success with a big heart.
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goodid 最近发言：
你不会算就不信，中南海的人却都清楚这笔帐，
小美眉问我，樱桃哪里买的？
李迎：就多维网站不实报导的公开声明
你的思路有点混乱，
大纪元《江泽民其人》也出了，去看看吧！
你的咒骂就是对博讯正义感的最好恭维！
宗坛判ID“玲玲”上狗头铡，切断"阴风"之源
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揪出邪党、610的狐狸尾巴，揭露邪悟者的面目
ID"修者"，邪悟到这分上，
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